“A festival is one way to destroy yourself in order to recover from the real world” Sayings like this only come from people who have never had to cross borders on such events. We have summarized 7 common Festival Fails, which make even the hardest and bravest festival freaks stumble...
Festival Fail No. 1 - Dude, where’s my tent?
You’ve lost your orientation; you are stumbling around the camping ground with no idea where your party tent is - a real bargain you’ve bought right before the festival. One tent looks like the other. Hoisting up a flag was too ordinary for you; downloading a “Refind your Tent” App too time-consuming and saving the GPS Data of where your tent is located – nah, you thought you’d remember it. It’s been three hours now on the camping ground since you’ve started looking for it. You are exhausted, empty, there’s no energy left for playing hide and seek with a damn tent. “Leave me behind, guys. Don’t worry about me! Think about the mission. That’s all that matters.”
Festival Fail No. 2 –When a body hits your tent like a tree in a thunderstorm
You finally made it, even though you’ve had a tuff beer challenge to win (breathe in, breathe out, drink water and start all over again) – you’ve reached your bed without vomiting. Whoop whoop! But then, in the middle of the breaking dawn, it suddenly hits you, respectively your tent. A beer buddy who was still looking for his tent (or whatever) decided on having a little lay down – right in your tent. He may stands up and leaves, but your fight with the sleep is starting all over again. Breathe in, breathe out…
Festival Fail No. 3 – The great tent looting
You are returning from the festival area, making your way through the tent rows, feeling a bit tipsy and ready for another camping ground party action, until you arrive at your tent. But wait a second – hell, no! You’ve been robbed! Some silly idiots have even taken your sleeping pad!
Festival Fail No. 4 –No network connection and an empty battery
You’ve lost all your buddies, because you’ve had to go back to the tent to get your jacket. Now you are trying to find your friends. But they are nowhere in sight: why not calling them? Ah, sure, no network connection. Doesn’t matter, your battery is low anyway. But once you’ve found a connection, your phone will shut down before you are even able to share your location with your friends. Welcome to Murphy’s Law!
Festival Fail No. 5 –Beer shit on the portable
You can feel the last night in your bones, but beer also messes with your poop. It’s time to go to the loo! No problem, if there wouldn’t be another 100 people having the exact same idea at the exact same time. After two hours waiting for a free portable, you’ve finally made it to shut the door behind you and - gross: What are all these people doing? You have to face a huge pile of shit from god knows how many other party people. There’s no to sit down on this portable toilet. While you are trying to figure out how to do it without shitting yourself, a tiny thought crosses your mind: “I wish I would have brought these diarrhoea pills with me!”
Festival Fail N0. 6 – The wild urinating: when your tent becomes a tree
If the rain hits the sides of your tent without even a single cloud in the sky – make a guess. It may doesn’t rain, but someone mistakes your tent for a tree. Fingers crossed it is rainproofed!
Festival Fail No. 7 – When setting up a tent becomes more challenging than a shelf from IKEA
...it may is a result of too many drinks. Everybody knows it: After a long day on the road you’ve finally made it to the festival ground. Everybody, except the driver, is already in a very good state of mind. First thing to do – get your camping chair out of the car and enjoy a first festival Schnapps! Fife hours later, gravity and alcohol turn setting up a tent into rocket science.
Little Insider-Hint: Everybody who doesn’t want to get in touch with wild urinating, forces of nature or tent-set-up, can now treat himself with a “ready for use” accommodation – e.g. a Festival-Lodge from My Molo